You’re A Ladybar!
You can tell this city is slowly returning back to its pre-Olympic state of social depravity by the number of people there are in the street asking you if you want to go to a ladybar. “Hello, hello, sir, you want ladybar? Massa-jee massa-jee best price.” We usually return this with “fuck off” in English.
One of my friends, however, has come up with a novel solution. He says, Bu, Ni shi ladybar! This means “No, YOU’RE a ladybar!” The guys look us in bewilderment because what we said really doesn’t make any sense, so they ask again, and we give them the same reply. Eventually they just give up out of boredom.
Something else just dawned on me. Before I leave this country I’m going to get video tape of me playing catch, either football or baseball, in Tnananmen Square. We’ll probably get about 30 seconds in before we’re told to stop, but that’s all I need to prove I did it.
